Time to give the world a wedgie…

Unfortunately I’ve been too busy to find time for a well orchestrated rant lately, so I thought I’d start early and get the poison out my system with a number of things that have been juicing my mental loins recently.

Sooner or later, you're gonna get fckdup...
Sooner or later, you're gonna get fckdup...

Case issue 1 – The dumb assed builders who have been trying to build a block of flats next to me for over 4 years now. I loosely use the word ‘build’ and ‘builders’ in that sentence as I don’t want to taint those who actually know how to erect a building in less time than it takes to construct the Pyramids.

I’ve worked in my youth on a building site for some six months when I was in between jobs in the UK, and the one housing estate I was involved in took less than 6 months to raise 36 houses, build the roads and lay the gardens – and we were taking it easy so I’m really at a loss when I see four to five guys emerging day after day without any substantial gain being made from a block of flats that looks exactly as it did when I moved in three years ago… At least two years after I know of it commencing.

Apart from the f*cking noise which usually begins everyday at 7am, their incessant screaming and shouting and their ability to p*ss the whole neighbourhood off, I’m struggling to justify what the hell they have achieved in the time taken.

Sure, my trees are all covered in dust and the garden’s now covered in rubbish strewn from the many balconies that these wankers chuck stuff off from, and hell yeah, I love their high pitched pathetic voices wailing at each other CONSTANTLY. Their need to answer their mobile phones and bypass the orbiting satellites by shouting as loud as they can serves me well too, especially when the only time these twats aren’t making any noise is when a phone rings and they feel the need to inform the whole area as to what a complete prick they are.

The way they block the street off with their vehicles, endlessly trying to park like lame old women brings me great delight too, however on the odd occasion they get a puncture from the many ‘stray’ nails lurking about everywhere, I do briefly feel a warm glow inside.

I do despair to their overall incompetence though, however I feel that sadly they aren’t completely at fault. Their arsehole of an owner rarely seems to have a clue as to what’s going on, being more content to look smug when he arrives in his Mercedes and needing to take at least 15 minutes to get out the car, allowing everyone within a 2 mile radius to appreciate what a complete wanker he is too. You don’t need to sit in the doorway shouting at the top of your voice for us to know that numbnuts, it was clear the day the guy sold you that car and allowed you to drive it away.

One day it took him nearly 15 minutes to park the damned thing, I nearly Car-Jacked him myself, I was debating pulling him out his f*cking car and driving it through the ground floor when I thought to myself, this is no good, I’ll have to hide all the other bodies too and If I need to cover them in Cement, it may take six months to arrive…

As for the other guy’s, well I suspect that they are just that immune from the necessity to actually finish the stupid building by now, half probably realising that when they do they may have no other ‘work’ – used loosely again, and the others probably forgot what they were supposed to be doing three years ago.

Every so often at night you can hear a dull banging sound, my guess is that’s there’s a small Greek guy trying to find his way out of that hole he started digging many moons ago…

Issue 2 – My other bitch is the f*ckwit who was driving the 623 bus yesterday afternoon. Apart from being an hour and a half late (earlier than the other twat the day before), he then proceeded to try and kill everyone by driving like a complete idiot. Not by trying to make up on lost time which you may hope for, but because whatever made him so late had clearly p*ssed him off to the point whereby he seemed happy to sacrifice everyone on the bus, on the street, pavement and Land Sea and Air in his pursuit of meeting God.

It was only when an elderly gentleman had gotten on and asked him where the hell he was going as the route we’d begun taking had been diverted due to the local weekday market, but by now the bus driver instead of actually rejoining the route seemed to be heading directly for Ano Patissia, the last stop.

Well, it’s times like this that I do wish I spoke more Greek. I had a pretty good Idea what the old man said to the Bus driver anyway though, he was extremely clear in his manner and the way he nearly blew steam out both his neck and arse left me with no illusions as to what was being discussed. The bus driver tried to make clear how he was feeling and before he had chance to finish, the elderly gentleman had one last outburst, rang the bell and when the bus stopped and the doors opened, he showed him the hand ‘να ρε’ and casually got off.

Priceless… He was still mumbling to himself, and for probably the rest of the day – the Bus driver that is… As for the old guy I kind of hope he went home, dusts off his old shotgun and goes to wait for the return trip. Anyway, the bus driver slowed down and almost kept to a reasonably safe speed for the rest of the way, ‘almost’ anyway. He seemed so shocked, and to be fair at one point I was hoping the old guy was gonna belt him one. I was all geared up for it anyway, I’d have had to have stepped in, I couldn’t allow and old man to start hitting a man at work, doing his job without joining in.

Even after he’d gotten off I wanted to give him a slap, probably actually more than before which was saying something.

So, fortunately I managed to get to the train station alive. Quite a novelty too this year as it actually works now as well. Well, I say works, it goes for about three stations before the ‘builders’ working on that have got it in ruins for about a further five or six stations, and then again you have to use your teleportation skills to get about. It’s unfair to try and compare Greek transport to British transport, my hatred of British Rails taints any unbiased opinion and the Greek transport system is still a work in progress, like my flats.

It was so bad at one point that I used to get on the train heading the wrong way to catch it going the other way three stops as they only allowed the train to stop at certain stations going one way…?!


A train, with doors on ‘both’ sides of the vehicle, going both ways, and yet some halfbrained monkey decides to only go one way and allow people on at specific stations…?! Logic was, or am I missing something in the equation…

My last bit of a rant is about these cursed Elections here that seemed to have been going on forever, any longer in fact and I’d have to probably put my money on the builders actually finishing first.

Thankfully I didn’t get all worked up about it. Several reasons really, one I just didn’t care. Two, I just didn’t care, and three, hmmm, the overwhelming choice of corrupt, non ethical lying thieving bastard wasn’t quite explained to me clear enough, and then I resorted to my first two choices, frankly, I just didn’t care.

Till I actually see someone here actually trying to change the way this socio-corrupt system works, it wouldn’t matter if you put the Virgin Mother in charge, we’re still gonna get screwed. That’s sadly what the Greek system does to you.

You try and help it, it f*cks you, you watch it f*ck people, it f*cks you. You try and fix it and everyone complains and you get f*cked. You try and make a difference and the people people f*cking you f*ck you some more because you may stop them from being able to f*ck you. You don’t do anything and complain about it, but do nothing, you still get f*cked.

When you come to Greece Papandreou himself should be waiting for you at the airport with a large Jar of Vaseline wearing nothing but a fake smile and an erection. It’s probably not his fault, but he’s gonna f*ck you too…

I have my own observations about Greece’s system anyway, and being unlucky enough to end up having to fight a bunch of lying corrupt despicable cretins as I did through coming to work and live a normal life wasn’t easy anyway, but sh*t happens, but what does p*ss me off is when people here do nothing about it. A few have even said I have no right to do anything as it’s not my country, not my problem. Well no, actually it is.

When the system tried to f*ck me over personally and allowed people to try and get away with ruining my life, stealing and threatening me, erm… yes, it became my problem. It became their problem, and it’ll become any f*cker who tries the same’s problem too. I didn’t ask for this sh*t, but I’ll recycle any that comes my way, and serve it up warm -that’s a fact.

I do love Greece but that doesn’t mean I can’t hate certain things about it. It’s not anti-Greek in anyway, I’m from the UK and there’s lots I really hate about that cold wet miserable sh*thole, so don’t take it personally, everywhere we live has some good and some bad. The things to hate are often justifiable though, mainly as we all hate them too, if not then we should as they let us all down most of the time.

I hear more malice to this Country from Greeks who have had a lifetime of this sh*t than I’ll hopefully ever have to endure before I match a Greek about their thoughts on the system but I won’t simply put up with it. Why should I or you, we deserve better.

If I’m paying for the priviledge of being f*cked, at least tickle my nuts and talk dirty to me, maybe try and wear something sexy for God’s sake, don’t just sit in your government office and invoice me for it after you’ve helped yourself to all you can at my expense in the first place.

Corruption here is sadly like a pandemic, and rightly so begun my story with (ΚΕΕΛΠΝΟ-KEEΛ). The Greek CDC, the governing body for infectious diseases, parasites and all manner of other degenerate maliciousness. Having dealt with a hierarchy that breeds corruption, which allows and helps it, and whose ‘legal’ department abuses every law to cover up the truth, its unsurprising to discover that this runs deep in it’s veins. Multiply this with the number of government offices who have unqualified, inexperienced people who don’t even know their own job let alone the point of the Place in which they work and hello, welcome to the Greek system. There a quite a few people who do know the deal and who can do what they should, (I’m guessing anyway) however the life and energy of these people is usually squeezed out of them long before the frappe break kicks in and they hand you over to another self righteous wanker who treats you with outright contempt for making them actually have to do a bit of their job.

When something is this infected – it’s probably better off being put out if it’s misery. This unfortunately would be my whole campaign for resolving many of the issues surrounding this organisation and one or two that have been discovered to be just as bad who nest themselves within it’s protected umbrella and who abuse us, the state and the system.

I will openly speak badly of this sector of Governance though with some delight as it’s ill governed, run by idiots with no moral or ethical principles, liars and thieves who are often incompetent at performing the simplest of tasks which they are set up to do, and YES, I speak from experience. When I say that you can go to a Ministry, (or several as the case is), with hard evidence as to who is stealing what, how and when and who has been pretending to be Doctors for the very same Ministry and they do nothing, it’s not just appalling, it’s embarrassing, and a pathetic evaluation of the ‘system’ here. It doesn’t get any worse than that – I sincerely hope so anyway however fear that if you were to scratch the surface it would.

More of this can be found here but that’s only part of the problem. The sick individuals who deceive people, pretend to be Doctors, who jeopardise the health and safety of those who seek aid are clearly one part of the problem but what hope do any of us have if the system doesn’t address these issues and make substantial changes so that others can’t do just as bad if not worse! So far in over two years fighting to highlight this criminal hideout, hardly any one has even been prepared to accept there is a problem, the hierarchy all the way up has shown complete and utter contempt for everyone by refusing to alter its code of practice, by placing safeguards to prevent such abuse, and to account for all the money stolen.

It’s not surprising to people’s trepidation when they hear that Greece is in the sh*t and needs money to pull itself out the deficit, Greece doesn’t need money, we give it more than enough. What it needs is these bastards who keep stealing it to be hanging from the lamp posts along Pattission…


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