The Elections 2012 – Celebrity ‘Malaka’ Factor begins…

If you hadn’t noticed, the ‘Greek Elections‘ are looming on the horizon and set to divide the Country yet further. This year however it seems like I’m the only person not running for Parliament.

– So far as I know anyway, maybe someone’s put me forward just in case there isn’t enough Political parties taking part already!

Had I a dodgy criminal past, affiliation with other unscrupulous characters or families as well as a general ignorance to the social and economic problems facing Greece, combine this with the ego and narcissism to lie and fabricate any number of ridiculous ungrounded Policies which lack vision or thought, (then and only then) would I consider any of the mainstream Political opportunities currently available.

Sadly and fortunately like many Greeks suffering at present, we’re just not that f*cking stupid or full of sh*t to attempt it in a manner which others are clearly more suited to doing for us.

So, the current elections seem to have become a parody of a modern day Greek tragedy- “Celebrity Malaka factor” as I like to call it whereby the only winner is the leader of one of the many half-baked bandwagons on offer, whereby too many Oozo’s fuelled a bunch of idiots into believing that they could run the Country better than the big fat guy who ate the two old men from the Muppets.

– I’m not 100% sure but I think that’s what happened originally, and now look at the fine mess we’re in. The Oozo, not eating the guys from the Muppets, I will have to check though just to be sure…

Muppets, which ones are you talking about...?
Venizelos explains how years of Kung Fu have paid off in fighting off opposition from the likes of the KKE and others…

Admittedly you’d really struggle to do worse than the last lot of incumbents, however that doesn’t necessarily make it a good idea either.

I personally was thinking about entering a Parrot I know in the local pet shop near me to run for Prime Minister. It wouldn’t be any different from most of the other party leaders standing to run either.

It know’s f*ck all about Politics, has no concept on the reality facing Greece, understands little about economics and finance yet would be able to reel off any sh*te it was taught like a pro. It wouldn’t surprise me if Papandreou was sat on his perch right now reading this thinking why would a ‘Pirate’ be entered into Parliament…!

‘Parrot’ numbnuts… I said Parrot…

Never in my life have I seen so much petty minded, blind, incompetent ignorance to the current problems facing Greece. Sadder still is that the majority of those sat discussing the future of Greece are the very same f*ckwits responsible for nearly plunging it into the dark ages already.

It’s like the blind leading the stupid. At least the blind have many other senses they can rely on, what do we have… Samaras? VenizelosPapariga?

Please spare me, you’d do better voting Sakis in… SAKIS! Where are you when we need you………All is forgiven, (except Eurovision), we’re desperate, not stupid…!

Vote for us and come see a WHOLE Country in Ruin...
Aleka Papariga shows off the new proposals for ‘their’ vision of Greece.

I wouldn’t have them in a sitcom about running a Country let alone anywhere near allowing them to do it for real. Except Sakis of course, he’d be great….

I’ve made it my mission to get Sakis involved anyway, he doesn’t know about it yet but we’ve got time and hopefully maybe 10 million Euro’s to spend according to the press reports of what some of the main parties have been allowed to spend, that will get me Sakis I hope and a few packs of Gum for those fierce Political rallies we’ll be on over the next week or so.

I drafted up our campaign poster : I opted for subtlety instead of something brash, you know, reach out to the demographic…

VoteSakis - "Lets face it, if we're going to get f*cked..."
VoteSakis – “Lets face it, if we’re going to get f*cked…”

On a random note, I loved Elvis Presley when I was a kid but I wouldn’t have him run the Country let alone advertise Burgers just because he may have ran for President or Prime Minister in his day. Sorry Elvis, you can shake your ass in that dangerously provocative way but get the f*ck out of Parliament with your Blue suede shoes…

“Coffee, smell, and wake the f*ck up” all spring to mind as a passive observer.

I’d frankly sooner have ‘George WW3 Bush‘ in charge over here, at least he’d kick start the economy – or at least fund another one whilst we stole whatever resources we could in the meantime, (no one would be wondering where the Oil came from) that’s a fact and at least those submarines Greece bought from Germany could get some usage too…!

Meanwhile we have everything except the ‘Monster raving loony party‘ fighting to run the Country. – Actually, except for the name, we have nothing BUT the monster raving loony parties running for governance.

If you don’t know anything about these fruitcakes, please visit this link when you’ve read this : Monster Raving Loony Party

Long story but as you may tell by the name, they weren’t in danger of running the UK and they had about as much chance as the Liberal Democrats did, thankfully…

At times like this you just want to wake up and hope it’s all a dream, or a Sitcom. Greece’s answer to ‘Yes Minister’ but it’s real.

Georgios Samaras prepares to run for president in between matches...
Yay, vote Samaras, thankfully not the ‘other’ one, – Georgios Samaras prepares to run for president in between matches…
Having been exposed to the Scottish way of life he’s not one to shy away from nutting anyone who stands between him and running the Country…I hope!

Unfortunately, the future of Greece currently hangs on which clueless halfwits fail to  address the obvious and do so by smoothing over the ever deepening cracks whilst continuing headlong down the same proven route to ruin.

The current instalment of Bailout money seems to only have funded the current farce and failed to address any fundamental problems facing the Greek system, economy and people right now.

Greeks have every right to question the validity of being in Europe when their own Government has failed to fulfil hardly any of the obligations expected of them since joining it, however misplaced anger towards Germany and other EU Countries is misplaced and unfair on a system (rightly or wrongly) in which Greece is apart of.

People here may have forgotten that the only reason why the Country has only been at 50% bankruptcy is because of the help provided by Europe thus far.

Like it or not, that little bit of money you may be still lucky enough to have is because of this fact.

I’m neither condoning or agreeing with the IMF and the Austerity measures which are being implemented however I have to acknowledge their impact on Greece even being able to have an Election right now.

Your views on the EU are all valid and poignant however this is not the feature or subject which I’m trying to address.

The fact that much of the EU funds will never see the average Greek citizen is ONE of many issues which need addressing however Germany didn’t appoint any number of past Greek Government’s in place over the years who openly abused the funds provided to them!

The German economy didn’t allow all the current Tax evaders who are now being dragged in by the state to milk the system at YOUR expense for over twenty years to get away with it for so long…

Having lived briefly in Germany I can honestly tell you that the extent of fraud and corruption currently facing Greece wouldn’t EVER have been allowed to happen in the first place. FACT.

The current problems are what happens when you allow the same arrogant families to pass the buck every new term.

They cover for each other and accept much of what happened before because they deliberately set out to do exactly the same themselves – ‘Etsi’…

Now, for whatever reason it seems like the extra pressure from the EU measures have forced a number of institutions into pro-actively seeking out those who got away with everything for so long previously.

– Good, lock em all up. Strip them naked and make them forage a living on the streets like everyone else.

Prison’s too good for many of them and the Death penalty isn’t quite the answer in many cases. Don’t get me wrong, I’d wire the f*cking lot up, save on electricity and fry them all to feed the poor at the drop of a hat but ‘apparently’ I can’t, it’s deemed wrong but I’m sure we all have a bit of rope somewhere in the house come the day…

So, whilst the news, social media and web become littered with the latest Political party propaganda b*llsh*t, remember first and foremost they are there for YOU.

You are not their tool or plaything, a statistic which they have any right to call their own or misuse in any way.


Laurel and Hardy share another joke as they plan on dividing up the spoils of the IMF bailout...
Laurel and Hardy share another joke as they plan on dividing up the spoils of the IMF bailout…

Don’t listen to their lies, their policy talk, their preconceived party political horsesh*t which they like to pump out time after time. Tell them what YOU want to happen. Tell THEM what YOU as Greeks want to be done.


I don’t care if you have to throw one in the boot of your car and take him to a secluded spot, duct tape him to a rocking horse overlooking a cliff and make him listen to what as a citizen YOUR sick of, but make them know.

Seriously, tell them why you’re sick of their deception, lies, scandals, lack of opportunities and mindless acceptance of what is wrong with the system. Do it, if they fail to provide you with the requuired answers that suit YOU the Populace then they don’t deserve to be ‘representing’ YOU and that rocking horse should be set free!

I use the term ‘representing’ loosely as we all know who they will always represent first and foremost, themselves. Mr. Aren’t I f*cking the saviour of everything ‘Self’.

If you know they have skeletons, dig them up, if you know they have been lying, prove it, if you know they have agenda’s expose them. But first and foremost, if you think they are doing anything which will further damage your Country, then don’t even entertain them.

The thing that REALLY p*sses me off with Greece is that when you talk to the average person about all this, they are aware of who the scum are, they know all the corruption cases and could give you a full run down of all the ‘non reputable’ activities these front-running Parties are responsible for… WTF!


“Once bitten twice shy” as the saying goes and the snakes in Government here outnumber the people in some areas where they seek Office. Ring any bells…

Let’s not kid anyone, Elections are a big thing, we all secretly think well what can ‘I’ do, little ol ‘me’.

Well, little ol you can do a lot, trust me I know.

I am but a humble guest of this great Country, one which now calls it home and one who knows how desperate and critical the state has become due to so much neglect, misinformation and lies. All no less given out by those who have failed to work on the behalf of the people of Greece and which now has affected those in Europe through this plight.

Yes, all those foreigners you hear moaning about the state of Greece, the state of the EU and the state of their own Countries in some cases. They pay taxes too, ones which have gone into Greek banks, the economy and much more so it too gives them the right to question what the **** is going on.

Most are supportive, many aren’t. But it’s how it is. You’d be the same if the shoe was on the other foot. What our Government’s do with OUR money is and should be a genuine concern we all have.

After all, it’s because of us they have it.

Many feel that dropping out of the EU will miraculously help Greece overnight, blaming everything from ‘Hitler’ to ‘Merkel’ for the current problems. Whatever happens though, it won’t be easy.

It will get harder but sacrifice comes at a cost.

To replace the funds stolen alone would make Greece rich again for sure, lost taxes, state sponsored malpractice and poor funding, cutbacks to the many aspects of gratuitous overspending by the many Ministries which seems to be a pandemic are all slowly being done which will in turn will make it work again.

You have the most glorious location, history, scenery and natural beauty the world has ever known – not to mention men and women who are truly descendants of Gods themselves, this used correctly will alone make Greece stand proud once more.

If any other Country in the world had half the attributes that Greece has going for it at any one time they wouldn’t know what to do with them all. – All I know is that they’d be rich both mentally and physically.

I recently read somewhere that the Spartans used to leave the inferior in the woods for the Wolves to eat, maybe we can reintroduce that again and do that with those responsible for what we now endure?

I’ve been here nearly 4 years (2 weeks away) and have seen much, fought tooth and claw for the chance to even be able to write this and I fully empathise with the people here. With the state and the system NO CHANCE.

“It’s f*cked…”

If it were an animal you’d have shot it long ago but many still cling to this ‘ideal’ as they know no alternative, they are blinded by a lack of vision and know how to manipulate what’s in place, they just want a go at it instead.

(This is the bit where we tie them to a tree in the woods).

Learn. Listen. Adapt and most importantly – MOVE FORWARD.

Failure to do anyone of the above gives us license to drag their sorry ass somewhere secluded and duct-tape them to that rocking horse overlooking the sea we mentioned earlier.

If you’re a voter, ask questions, expect answers that suit YOU, not them and sh*t them the f*ck up while they listen to YOU.

It’s YOUR Country, not theirs.

A Country of wonder and natural beauty...
A Country of wonder and natural beauty, and yet at times all we do is wonder and watch many destroy it’s beauty…

2 thoughts on “The Elections 2012 – Celebrity ‘Malaka’ Factor begins…

  1. The beginning of a modern day Greek tragedy unfolds as the Elections grow near. Greece stands closer to becoming further divided in the run upto what experts are calling ‘Celebrity Malaka Factor’…

    I appear to be the only person not running for the role of Prime Minister, however till the ballots come out I can’t be sure that someone isn’t using my name to make up the numbers.

    Watch this space to see a Political system fall apart at the seams as the future of this great nation is being fought over by the same cretins who nearly destroyed it recently.

    Between the three main parties in contention, everyone from Ronald McDonald to Homer Simpson still has an outside chance at being voted in and if you have connections in the right places, YOU TOO could be the next Prime Minister of Greece…


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