Top tips on how to deal with the dumbest of creatures, the ‘online troll’…?

Disclaimer I :

Firstly, and my sincerest apologies to readers who’ve just stumbled onto this blog/post by accident (or) to those who innocently thought to themselves, “oh look, another post by ‘fckdupathens‘, it’s been a while, so let’s see what the feisty little sh*t’s been up to…”, well, you’re about to find out and it’s not going to be a quick stroll through the calmer more creative recesses of my mind either!

To coin a phrase, I’m c*nstipated having had to deal with one online c*nt too many, and so here we go…strap in, it’s likely to be quite the journey…

It’s probably going to get a little fruity in part too, and for that I have no intention of apologising either.  It might help if you put on RATM “Killing in the name of “and roll with it, (or) jog on…

Either way, you have the power…and likewise, and with no disrespect “f*ck you…I won’t do what you tell me”, this is my house of pain…

Disclaimer II :

Furthermore if you’re one of these pathetic online morons who can’t be bothered to read information provided, and yet still try to pick apart an argument or point as covered below without anything to contribute, then go f*ck yourself you inbred loser, I mean, grow the f*ck up… You’re partly the reason for post’s like this anyway you discombobulated sh*thead and will more than likely be featured somewhere below anyway, so deal with it you mardy little twat…

So, it’s probably safe to say that this post wasn’t genuinely intended for normal consumption and was written having dealt with one c*nt too many this week.

Apologies in advance.

Proceed with caution :

If music be the food of love, then this post may be the g-string wedged snugly between your cheeks…and without further ado, let’s play on…

It’s been a bit of a tense year already as many of the saner people in life will in part also recognise already, (this will become more apparent as you read on), but this most recent chapter in life is just the result of having to wade balls deep through the vacuous sea of morons that linger aimlessly online like some brain damaged fungus, bereft of purpose or intellect and with no direction, passion or sense of humanity, and yet who interject at every given opportunity under the illusion that their nonsense, abuse, immaturity and abject stupidity is an acceptable ‘norm’.

It’s not just me discovering them on an almost daily basis either, it turns out it’s not a new phenomenon by any stretch of the imagination,and god knows we need one these days!?

Who knew… ? Well, after a quick assessment – I spoke to a few people, we did the science and it appears we all do indeed know just that, they’re everywhere, like crusty dogsh*t hiding under the leaves.

So… What is abject stupidity!?

Chances are that if you don’t know already, then you may have already been blessed with it.

In which case I really wouldn’t carry on reading any further.  There’s going to be a lot of words, quite a bit of anger and things which will no doubt offend those who this applies to, otherwise i’d say more than most will understand completely and side with me when I say with a hand on heart, if you don’t like it, “kiss my peachy ass“…#truestory

If you are unfortunate enough to go online regularly and frequent the many hells that social media has more recently become, then you’ll know exactly what ‘abject stupidity‘ truly is.

I think it’s safe to say that the first observational symptoms were probably witnessed in the earliest ‘comments feed’ of youtube videos going back to the sites origins, where any non argumentative video would solicit the attentions of a subspecies of human which over time has become known as the humble ‘online troll’.

To be fair, some of the best non rational, insane and humorous comments still exist on videos whereby some bored lunatic just let loose on a cookery video for no reason at all, or a hand craft video showing how to make ‘pot pourri‘ from cornflakes!?

Now reddit, facebook and many other online platforms have become the lair of the ‘online troll‘, the ‘sleeper agent‘, the ‘robot‘ and or the most loathsome of beast’s – the ‘maga-man/woman‘…

Not to be confused with the long lost ‘Republican’ who share many of the same politics, but minus the lunacy as exhibited by the others, these two shouldn’t be confused either, despite being similar in many ways, but not so warped to make up stories like we see so regularly on the news.

*Camera usually pans to some old guffer who claims she heard a story about 8ft Mexicans with small Pox who were smuggling duct taped women over the border to exchange for $10,000 that George Soros’ promised them… No really… This is where we’re at, people so caught up in a lie it’s beyond fiction.

I wouldn’t like to say that these are in anyway the same, but the desired effect/result, and reoccurring issue to arise from this plethora of buffoonery is indeed one and the same for many of us all regardless.

I dare say that there are many variations, many probable causes and reasons for their involvement online, but irrespective, their complete and abject stupidity, deliberate and misinformed ignorance and unwavering insolence is usually accompanied by an underlying childish and immature hatefilled arrogance that defies belief, and does leave us at a loss for words more often than not.

Obviously there is always the (block/delete) option if they become more than just an online scourge to which our tolerance can handle no more, but we shouldn’t have to resort to this as a default action because some asshat can’t handle an alternative opinion to their own, and unless experience has taught us so much already.

To quote that baboon in the White House, “there are good and bad people on both sides, and in this case, there are”. #truly

I myself really try to tolerate people for as long as possible, partly because I do like the mental stimulation you get watching a halfwit dig themselves so deep into an online hole, that you can audibly hear others online rolling their eyes.  Sadly these morons make up for their lack of intelligence with more than enough tenacity and stupidity to wear you down and as it has been duly noted :


Occasionally every now and again you have the misfortune of dealing with an absolute f*ckmuppet who doesn’t even offer the equivalent of an intellectual snack, let alone a few crumbs, and so here began my week.

A diet largely consisting of an over enthusiastic arsehole, followed by a side order or malicious pettyness that you honestly wouldn’t expect to see in children, let alone a so called grown man.

Now this kind of pathetic behaviour sadly is all too familiar online as some of these idiots de-evolve into lesser primates, too unfit and too stupid to climb back up the tree of wisdom from which they once wish they’d fallen.

Meanwhile, I had one such encounter the other day and having had enough of abusive social diseases like this particular one, had to highlight this in all it’s glory and to use it as a social awakening for myself and others subject to such abysmal behaviour.

Return of the numpty :

The reason why I take such an aggressive stance on (pardon my french) – hostile c*nts like these is because if you haven’t read any of the blog already, I ended up fighting corruption in Greece and had to endure death threats, being attacked, abuse few could even imagine, and had to spend nearly 10 years fighting a foreign legal system hell bent on destroying me, all whilst fighting their torrent of abuse and misery as we exposed them and brought Justice to bear.

(It’s all covered within the blog), and equally in many ways largely irrelevant bar for the fact that I’m so sick of degenerate scumbags like the ones now featured, who all act like they’re something special because they hide behind a keyboard and know f*ck all about ANYTHING.

After all that I’ve been through, this sh*t is like an appetizer that just leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

So, allow me to set the scene…

A thread starts by redneck hill billy number 1… Now this guy I kid you not is a redneck hill billy. I’m genuinely not being disrespectful to hill billy’s here either.  I loves me some Catfish Cooley and know a lot of Americans are damned good people, but we have this #maga touting Justin hater, convinced the Planet is 6000 years old and that global warming is a conjob because the good lord – Donald ‘son of God’ Trump says so.

I kid you not.  Now seriously, if you doubt Global warming is a ‘thing’, then you’re a f*cking turnip, plain and simple.  And it’s not up for debate either.

The science is done and without further ado, go f*ck yourself.  Seriously.  :

F*ck off.

You offer me, science, the Planet and society absolutely nothing, and in all fairness, when the sea’s rise and food becomes sparse, I’ll carve your skull open with a blunt spoon to make sure I don’t starve because of your fetid ignorance.  Not because your brains will feed me, but just so I make sure that peanut isn’t ever an issue or threat to me or civilisation in any other way.

I digress… SO, ah yes. Hill Billy number 1.

Now to be fair, apart from his absurd reasoning when it comes to religion, science, the world we live in, rational arguments, current affairs and his genuinely sad immaturity when it comes to him name calling me (#simple simon) – never had that before…seriously, we’re dealing with children…otherwise I actually do enjoy the intellectual stimulation he provides to everyone whilst we tear his stupidity apart, word by word, day after day…

It’s quite the spectacle these days and to his credit, at least he’s committed…Or should be!

He’s not malicious, and so at times, (briefly), I almost feel quite sorry for him, till he rears up an hour later, and starts all over again albeit with another absurd or stupid theme.

So, me a few others and this guy have quite a history online, he rears up and tries to sell his bullshit arguments, his fascist ideals or his hateful religious rhetoric and we rise up and give him the intellectual smackdown as appropriate, it’s become comical, but in good spirits considering…

It’s become a kind of daily mental exercise. So, for all intents and purposes, we’ll call him Anthony… 😉

Oh Ma Gerd :

Anthony now, having spent weeks battling to convince me that a  Zombie Jesus was normal because he wasn’t human, and that Noah didn’t have to round up all the animals two by two to get them in the Ark, informs me that the animals just turned up of their own volition…!? I kid you not…

Some magic WIFI and google maps combo I guess?

You can’t make this sh*t up, but yes, this happenes, and too often! As it happens, unless you similarly believe that some dude sat in a cloud made it so, this is all completely rational and as he later said to me : “I need to get a grasp of reality”!

I thought I was going to laugh a lung up.  Seriously!

The day begins, he now posts a link to a story demeaning teachers, parents and kids who’ve had two snow days due to the bad weather here and proceeds with his usual tripe hoping to divide and cause anger among’st people for no reason…  You know the type I’m sure, so desperate for attention it’s painful to watch, or a Russian troll too stupid to see how we’re not that intellectually challenged to sit idly by.

As expected, I naturally leap’t on his comment like it was a live grenade, just to make light of his ‘lack of education’ being an issue, very MUCH made obvious by his lack of knowledge on pretty much everything that he mentioned and covered – as did everyone else, as usual, the main focus on the schools I knew had nothing to do with the teachers either.  It’s a governing body issue.

So then we have angry Hill Billy number 2, we’ll call him Nick Keating for all intents and purposes and the reason why his names not been changed will become quite obvious in a second.

There’s a few more who will get the treatment too, especially those who think bullying and threatening people, abusing them and attacking them as they have me and my animals is ok, and I’ll get to those cretinous bastards in due time.

Spotting little penis syndrome :

He posts the following, skirts everyone else’s comments and attacks me directly as depicted below, having had no prior knowledge of this f*ckwit ever before :


Now I hadn’t even mentioned anything about ‘staying in bed’ or to ‘dont risk it’ or anything else whereby he felt it appropriate to start an online dickfest for no reason…

To be honest I was enjoying my little jibe with Anthony, it was the early morning starter that usually sets everyone up for the day ahead…

Incidentally, I was part raised in Montreal for years and went to school in snow 5ft deep and in drifts where we clung to the bus bumper and boot slid our way to school through the winter months, so I don’t give a rats ass about snow, or snow days, times change, so whatever!?  Some love it, some don’t.  It’s all relative…

But I certainly didn’t say it was one or the other, my only insight having known many embattled teachers was that I know that they only have the kids well being at heart either way. #FACT

Anyway, I tolerated this imbeciles pathetic insults maybe half a dozen or more post later before realising that this hateful little turd was just looking to spout his little man anger at me and everyone else all day without any logic, and somehow then tried to twist the fact that I was some kind of Trump supporter…!

Yeah, I know…Me…MAGA…I nearly fell off the chair. If you don’t know me, I don’t hate Trump because of his Politics, I hate the orange faced lowlife because he’s a blight on mankind and gives decency a hernia by still existing.  He’s a vile and appalling pig and were it not for the promise of Justice and Karma, and knowing that the lies and misery he inflicts on us all, will soon be over, I might be a little more outspoken than I already am, so there’s being a c*nt and there’s a Nick Keating level of being a c*nt…

I don’t mind angry logic and people getting het up over their own beliefs, but just swearing and abuse, screw that.

I’m not new to the internet and as my blogs may insinuate, I don’t shy away from a good honest debate or argument, it takes a special kind of c*nt to make me block them, and so after abusive comment after abusive comment, I reached my limit, still being as comically civil as I could be.

Half an hour later I recieve a random message by someone else I’ve never met with a fyi message and a screen grab of this :


So, I’m flattered to be thought of so highly…I mean, what are we talking, maybe 12 years old at best here!?

Yes, I’ll be honest, my desire to just exchange abuse with a complete wanker all day was pretty low. As it always is…

My first thought was thanks, I’d forgotten who I am, good to know what and who I am…and then I saw what he’d written…

So school began again…

Meanwhile the guy who’d messaged me to tip me off said that the prick had turned on him when he just queried his bullshit about me hating Trump, he then proceeded to call him a f*cking loser and apparently they got stuck into it for 56 comments worth too… LOL

At what point did people become so pathetic that they leave school, interact with people socially whilst pretending to be adults before pulling up a fresh nappy and throwing their toys out the pram like petulant children…!?

Now I’m just guessing – but I reckon this douchebag’s not got much of a life going on…  I could be wrong, but if you see the rest of his dirge online, how he attacks and abuses everyone without even addressing their issues, it’s clearly a failing of EPIC proportion on education!

And this ‘eventually’ leads me onto my main, and long lost point!

The point : (like really…)

Forget the post, maga, Trump, Religion, and or anything we may or may not believe in, what happened to respect and virtue, humility and compassion acting like adults, people civilised human beings etc…!?

I appreciate that half these vacuous turds are online for propaganda, online sleeper agents, fake profiles, all with dubious intent and always looking to cause unrest and capitalise on people’s misery and turmoil, some are no doubt bots, used to fill up adds and likes to legitimise another bullshit post and article, and some are just plain and simple the lowest form of society, graciously dumped on us all without any concept of morality, decency or respect, and all content knowing that they aren’t within arms reach of what their parents should have given them when they were born nothing more than a mardy little twat.

Half sadly do fall into the same category, ill-informed redneck, maga hat wearing, conspiracy theory chasing deep state hypocrites, all bent on pushing their corrupt beliefs on everyone else whilst not even adhering to their own pious and self righteous bullshit, all with nothing to say, nothing to support their beliefs, and nothing to enforce their lies other than “God said it’s all good” bullsh*t.

So I think it’s fair to say n behalf of everyone else, who’s all sick of your horsesh*t, grow the f*ck up!

As a so called advanced and intellectual society, we’re ALL sick of tolerating your delusional nonsense. Like really, if you we’re a child it wouldn’t even be acceptable because kids f*cking learn, or at least have that hope!?

As a species, we take two steps forward and three back to drag your sorry uneducated ignorant halfwit lumps of burger eating flesh up to speed, only for you to deny logic, science and rational thought at every turn…why, because of your science denying, flat earth, deep state, lock Hilary up bollocks!?


We got a life to live, a planet to look after and a God to worry about IF and WHEN he ever f*cking turns up! Till then :


Firstly, if you can’t adhere to the laws that mankind as a WHOLE obeys, just get the f*ck outta here.  Just don’t try and pretend you can fit in and be civil when you can’t even live as human beings…

If you deny science and don’t believe in global warming, then deny yourself some more and refuse to partake in the Oxygen your body needs to survive, and do us all a favour, I’m looking forward to seeing how you God deals with that.

Secondly, if you need a book to tell you not to do or don’t do anything, make sure it contains some relative information, like an Encyclopedia, or a dictionary, or both, not Kanye West’s greatest thoughts…or Mary f*cking Poppins, but even that would be better than a book about a talking snake and a book that NEVER taught that is was OK to lie, like you all do, like a man you seem to support does, and who flaunts morality and common decency like it’s an illness.

You’re the illness, a blight on mankind and one I pray the rapture rids us of you soon enough before you pollute, corrupt and destroy any more than you already f*cking have!

And thirdly, if you can’t attack someones argument before you attack them as a person, and act like a loser online, don’t act all surprised when forevermore people see you as a feckin loser…

Like d’uh…

The Gospel according to decency.

FYI : Believing in religion is akin to spirituality, do so, it’s a wonderful thing, but it’s a personal thing.

Just don’t turn up with your delusional ‘holier than though bullsh*t’, pushing insane nonsense that NO one can back up, and expect it to be accepted without fits of laughter when you try and tell us you believe in things so inhumanely absurd and self serving, or racist and malicious, without being seen as a delusional and cruel lunatic.

Your God may well have told you whatever the f*ck he did in your book, mine if I had one, would tell ME to tell YOU to go f*ck yourself without prejudice and would tell me so equally if I allowed myself to be so brainwashed that I didn’t question the very fabric of a story so far fetched it bears no resemblance to the world and universe we actually DO know and inhabit…

Now we don’t all have to agree, diversity is a wonderful thing, but debate and disagreement don’t have to always end up in butthurt cry fests.

There’s many people I’ve fallen out with, disagreed with and yet had a laugh with over something else, happens most days in some way or shape and always will.

Hockey, love the sport, your team might beat mine, (I doubt it), but they might 😛 but I can still sit and have a beer and talk bollocks all night without sulking over it…

Live and let live, and if having a ‘God’ makes you happy and able to live like a human, we’ll all embrace your beliefs, just as I without a book am happy to equally live mine, but I don’t need to sell you or convert you to the world we live in, it’s real and surrounds us all, TODAY, and TOMORROW, and forever till we break the Planet we live on, but don’t live everyday thinking God will clean up after you like he’s your bitch, because ain’t no one dealing with that sh*t.

You just can’t pick and choose which bullsh*t is relevant when it suits, every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

To coin a phrase :

“Please, ma cherie, I told you, we are all victims of causality. I drank too much wine, I must take a piss. Cause and effect…” – The Matrix.

Now convince me there’s a Monica Bellucci awaiting me in Heaven, and I’ll be in church repenting like a bastard every Sunday…

Peace out…

Here concludes my rant.

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